What dreams are made of

/ vendredi, août 31, 2007

I mentioned yesterday that I was in a dilemma. But I never actually said what the dilemma was. Finding a job is the big picture.

The real dilemma is to choose between what I want for myself and what my parents want for me. Or rather what they hope I'll do. It is even more difficult when I am not 100% sure what kind of job I want for myself. Of course it has something to do with the very very general degree I hold. If I had a professional degree, the options would have been easily narrowed down and I would not need to search high and wide just for the right job. When there are too many options, you can be just spoilt for choice, and that's what is happening to me right now.

I'm really thankful that I'm not forced to be this and that, but the fact that my parents ask me why I do not want to do a certain job stresses me out like crazy sometimes. If I want to stay in the same for at least a decade or more, surely I should do something I like right?

I know joining MOE seems to be the trend for those who hold a B.A. degree, but that doesn't mean I should just go with the flow. I also know if I applied, I'd have a very good chance of being accepted unless I say something really stupid like "I'm just applying because my parents hope I'll be a teacher" or "there's no other job". Still, I believe that for a profession like teaching, you need to really have the passion for it. You should have the passion for anything you do, for that matter. But I don't even feel an ounce of passion in me telling me to be a teacher.

So I just hope that everyone has faith in me. I'll get a job soon and I will do it right. I'm not having it easy bumming around at home doing nothing. It stresses me out so much that sometimes I can't sleep.

Please, just believe in me, and I'll believe in myself.

I painted my dreams at 5:41 AM

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